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May 2012 Archives

Picking Battles, Wisely

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I now have more time behind me than in front of me. Lots to tell!

My memory is shot. I can't remember simple words and get frustrated and angry or I lose train of thought and promptly forget it. Last week, I forgot to go for my blood tests, which would have marked 3 months and another viral load check.

My hair is rapidly falling out and I have a couple bald spots. I hate that -- I really do.

I'm getting rashes all over. Yes, I am using cream to moisten the skin but its itchy as hell.

My sister firmly believes I deserve this -- all of it. She sees me on a good day and figures there's nothing wrong so basically I am a "liar" about the side effects. Yeah? Well, just ask my son -- he is seeing it 24/7. He tried to explain it to her on the phone -- bless him, he's 12 -- and she basically said, she doesn't see it.  

I'm losing weight because I've lost my taste buds.  Everything tastes the same and is boring. I'm drinking lots of water and liquids (no booze) and eating every now and again (once a day to keep my strength up).

Wish the weather would get warmer so I can get outside to garden. This would take my mind off so much. 

Not working a lot because I work as a service provider. After about an hour, I get angry at customers and that's not good so I sign off and don't make money.

We have a neighbourhood bully and she is picking on a rather timid woman who has an autistic child. She lives beside me. This neighbourhood bully and I don't get along because I'm not afraid of her and won't back down from her. Bullies all have one thing in common, when you stand up to them, they back down. This woman who lives beside me is afraid to talk to me because of this other bully. Man, can life get any better??

I know I need to not get involved in this but the bully also demeans and yells at kids, which irks me. I can't wait until the end of July when I have all my strength and oxygen in my blood. Right now if I yell for a sentence, I'm winded.  

The result from the shots on Mondays are different every week. Some weeks I feel sick for a day, other weeks I'm sick for days. Last week I didn't feel a thing and wondered if I gave myself the shot properly. I did -- the rash is there.

Anyhow, I have decided that I need to give up all the advocating for timid people -- for now -- and stop trying to convince my sister that I am sick and the personality changes and irritability are part of the meds. I give up. She can talk to me in August when this is all over.  My son has been instructed not to talk to her about me or what is going on here. I will not prevent him from talking to her, I just don't want to. She's giving me the silent treatment anyway.  All because I said she needed to lose weight or die. I should mind my own business because I'm still smoking.


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This page is an archive of entries from May 2012 listed from newest to oldest.

March 2012 is the previous archive.

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